This page was designed for systems running:

Screen resolution at 1024 * 768

Browsers running at least frames and Javascript (preferably IE 6.0 or later) I should have checked these pages in Netscape before the final release but I'm an IE user so you can guarantee it will work as intended in IE.

I give the following disclaimer:

This is my personal homepage. Consequently I reserve the right to give personal opinion on this site. Most of the information here is utterly biased and that's the way it's going to stay. If I've offended you in this site go somewhere else, if you disagree with my point of view on anything write your own webpage in refute. Don't email me saying you're offended because I've laughed at you, given your club a bad review or pissed on your favourite band, you're likely to find I either ignore you or post what you've said somewhere amusing for my benefit. Rude correspondence will be met in kind. I will however attempt to fulfill polite requests regarding photographs and captions, particularly where you were an unwilling or unwitting participant.

This site will never be free advertising space. Don't email me with your club news or shop flyer to try and get a nice review... if I like what you've done you'll probably get a free mention anyway... if you try and push me to mention your achievements I'm only likely to point out what a cheap bastard you are and how bad your schmoozing technique is.

Other notes:

The site is always being updated, check the front page 'news box' for recent details. There are no deadlines for material on this webpage, therefore there is no way for updates to be 'late' suggest such a thing and inspire my wrath. On average I post updates every 10-14 days, which usually accounts for about 20 hours work... this is equivalent to a part time job... it takes a lot of effort to maintain this site and I would appreciate more positive input and less demands from its users.

If you are going to link to me, or would like to include my page in a web ring or similar please email me first, just so I know who's referencing my site.

Feel free to send me free stuff if you're enamoured with my page *grin* Gratuitously high heels in an American size 7 or Penguin mints always go down well.

Please don't steal my code or graphics... if you want somethind done just ask I'll probably want a break from more techy work and do it for you anyway.